Perception is a Gift

The End, of this part.

2008-12-30T19:04:00.002+08:00

Before I type a post too long to see the end, I guess I'll put this here first:
moved- to http://transcendingpeace.wordpress.com

I was just looking back at some of my previous blog posts today. Previous meaning from the start, in 2006. It's been a long way I've gone through these 2 and a half years. And I remember saying this in one of the posts. That I'll one day, look back and realize how immature I once was. And this indeed has come true. At least I was right about one thing at that time :D. But then, it wouldn't be my fault would it? We all were once young, and then we change as we grow older. I must say these 2 years have involved a lot of change. And I feel somewhat satisfied that I've recorded them in this form. I really doubt I'll ever read them again in my life. But I'll leave it here for bored people looking around for stuff on the internet. But then again, wasn't that how this blog started? From absolute boredom. But now, my life has a purpose. And I am sure of that. And.. I shall say no more, just that if you happen to read any previous posts and cannot believe I wrote them, yes, they were me. But not now.

Choir?

2008-12-24T20:35:00.004+08:00

My holidays have been a really long one, filled with so much stuff- OCIP, rehearsals, Church Camp, Carolling and whatever else.. And I can't believe there's still 2 more weeks to go. I can't wait to go back to school, to meet all my friends, start lectures and tutorials again.. And then someone told me, "just take some time to rest". And I realized how beautiful that word was at that point in time, which was just a few minutes ago. And then now I'm thinking about choir. Somehow, it's the only thing that has etched such beautiful memories in my life this year. Nothing else.

I still remember signing up for 8 ccas during the exhibition, then I only went for 3. And I still remember choir auditions, when I didn't know at all what was going on, I just followed instructions to sing all the la's, smile and relax, by the teacher I knew who seemed to be in charge of us since day one in ac, and wore flowered shirts. After singing the Fairfield school song, forgetting half the lyrics, I left, not expecting anything. I didn't even know what a choir was all about. I just knew you'd get lots of cca points in secondary school. After the second audition, I was called to go for sectionals in the bass section. A bass 1, they called me, apparently, basses who sing their higher range. And then I met a few others, none of which knew what choir was about. In fact, none of them were from choir before, I think. We learned things like using our abdominal muscles to sing, breathing properly, and parts of 2 songs I clearly remember as 'Rytmus' and 'Pange Lingua'. Well, learning the parts were okay, but looking at the score gave me a headache. Having grade 1 music theory which I obtained in pri 1, the only thing I knew was that I had to sing higher then the black dots were placed higher in the score, and the same for lower. Oh, and that whatever we were singing would sound weird if the note was a sharp or flat, that which I identified by watching out for the #s and the bs. So I'll just memorize everything that my section leader taught me.

When I was accepted into choir, I thought I'll just go for a few rehearsals and then quit, because I didn't think that I would be the kind of guy who sings. I was actually intending to join lifeguards. But then, the way the teachers spoke to us after rehearsals made it seem like they were expecting us to stay. And I guess it psychoed me not to think about quitting at all. I was, in a way, afraid of quitting. So I continued, and I went for my first performance during founder's day, and got my concert gear.

Choir wasn't really that bad. I enjoyed singing together with the bass section, joking about the tenors, and just spending time together singing, laughing, and everything else. The music we created was beautiful. I never knew such beauty existed. Whenever I saw 'music' on someone's friendster profile, the first thing that would come to mind would be modern music. But then, this was different. When many parts came together, singing different parts, it was perfection. And there is no other word I can use, I just can't describe it. A tingling sensation would come everytime I sang with the choir. And then, I realized I never knew music. Choir was like being born into the world a baby. When my senses detected something new, I would be amazed. And I would appreciate it.

And then came something new. The teachers started talking about expression. That meant we had to express the music in our faces. Not knowing exactly what they wanted, I just smiled everytime I sang, and they seemed quite happy with it. So haha. okay. I continued to do so. Thinking that was the end, I got shocked again, when I heard "Bless the audience with your music". Again, it was like giving a baby a new toy. What does that mean? How do I do it? Aren't we just singing? I knew I was being blessed my the music, and by the choir, but blessing others? They aren't singing, how can they experience the satisfaction of creating such beauty? With so many questions in mind, my life in the choir went on..

We started learning songs to be sung for a competition held in Europe. There were 9 in total, and every rehearsal, we would work on those songs. I was starting to get the hang of music scores. I found out that sounds actually had pitched, and pitched actually had specific names. So I started learning music on my own using a virtual keyboard on my computer. I was starting to discover music. Just like working out the features of my new toy in this amazing world of music.

There was a particular competition song called "Karimatanu Kuicha", we called it 'kari'. Apparently, singing involved clapping and stomping too! Well, it was quite fun, until our seniors reminded us that we had to memorize the scores. Some of my bass seniors told me that last year as J1s, they would meet up during common breaks to practice this song together.

I enjoyed singing so much I could not give up that opportunity. haha.. So I discussed it with a fellow bass member, and managed to contact an alto. And then it went on to a few sops. Soon, I had a small choir to practice with! (The sops made the effort to convince me to invite some tenors too.) I got all their timetables, and we met up whenever we could to practice. Now my love for music had extended into school, and I never regretted giving up my breaks for it. During this time, I learnt how to use a tuning fork, and derive pitches from it. Then we started meeting in the mornings before assembly to practice, and started with the other songs too.

At that point in time, I looked back and was amazed once again. this time, by how much I had learnt from the choir. Not just in terms of music and singing, but I never thought I would be instructing a group of people in warm-ups, and in singing. Choir had me changed so much. Back in secondary school, I never felt this way towards my cca. For the choir, I could give up my mornings, my breaks, my time to learn music, to arrange practices. I never regretted.

I was from a co-ed school, and encounters with the opposite gender were not rare. (I bet many of you saw this coming.) But anyway, some things happened during this time, and I can't help but speak the very least about it, as it has been a part of my life in the choir. Yes, that's the least.

We went on the competition, and won. To me, those 3 titles we had, those 3 golds didn't mean much. Choir had given me friendship, had shaped my character, changed my life. What more could I want?

On one of the days during tour, a question was raised. "We always talk about blessing others with our music, but what exactly does it mean to do that?" And then that question struck me again. I reflected on my performances. All this time I had been expressing the music on my face. I enjoyed doing it as the music spoke to me. It was natural. But then, blessing others? Was I really blessing others by doing that or is there some other secret formula, or something I'm not doing yet? I didn't quite get the answers that were thrown out, so the question continued to hang around in my mind.

After tour was our concert, which came quite quickly after several rehearsals. By then, the music and I were one. I knew it inside out, and gave my best for the performance. Then the teachers started talking to us about comm. I had already considered it before, but I didn't know exactly what it was. Again, it was something new in choir for me. I knew I wanted to serve the choir. It was my passion. everything in it. The people, the music, they were all beautiful.

So I signed up for president, and section leader, thinking that it would be fun to be able to lead others in such a way. After all, I knew I had enjoyed it when we were practicing during our breaks in the early part of the year. However, my interview results were different. I was nominated for Property manager and Resource & Relations. And I had no idea at all as to what their responsibilities were. I just knew that the pm was someone who would scold you if you left things behind, and turn on the air-con before rehearsals. The r&r gave out scores and tuning forks. I admit, for a period of time, I was extremely disappointed that I could not get the position I wanted. I wanted it too much, that my intentions had changed. I still wanted to serve the choir with all I had, but there were other motives I found in my heart. After talking to God for a very long time about it. I refound my wanting to serve the choir. This desire was pure. To serve the choir, to serve God, and nothing else. I gave a speech, and became r&r.

I quickly got excited about my responsibilities, and set many goals to achieve, one of which was to clean the store and create a database of the scores we had. I'm now still working on it.. haha..
But other than resource, my title had something else. Relations. My predecessor didn't speak much about it as the resource part took a long time. I just knew that I had to be concerned about the members in the choir. I encountered cases in which there were conflicts within the choir, or problems that some members had. And after a while of trying to help them, and trying to understand the situations, I knew I had discovered relations on my own. Aside from all that, relations was quite 'free for all'. In the sense that I had ideas for the choir discussed it with the comm to put them into action. Of course, at this point in time. I need to give credit to my senior r&r, I couldn't have gone through so much without his constant guidance. heh, and if you're reading this, I'm sorry for disturbing you even when you cca season was over. I guess choir bugs us even after we left huh? haha..

Just about almost a month ago, I had a stayover with some friends from the choir. We were walking back to the house, singing carols at the same time. A lady walking in front of us heard our singing, and remarked that it was beautiful. That word was on my mind for a while, but I shoved it away. She asked us if we could sing for her friend who lived in a condo nearby. Without giving our reply, she assumed consent and brought us to her friend's house, and we sang 'O Come, All Ye Faithful". And then, halfway through the song, a sudden realization struck me when I saw the expression the lady's friend had on her face. Both of them were smiling, but it was a different kind of smile. I could sense their surprise, their awe, and their appreciation of the beautiful music we were creating. They could feel the music they way I did. Exactly the same way. And there was no doubt about it. They loved the music even though they weren't singing at all. And I knew I was blessing them, so I gave my heart, my love for music, love for choir, and every bit of meaning in the lyrics I had. I was blessing them. At that point in time, I wasn't even singing to a proper audience, it wasn't tables of ASEAN officials, or judges for a competition, or family members and friends. They were just a stranger and her friend. But it was the performance in my life I gave the most. Finally, I was giving music. Not just pitch and dynamics, for they were just a part. But true music, it had everything.

Carolling has just ended, and so has my year as an ACJC choristor. It has been great, and every other word I can find to describe it. And I look forward to the year ahead.

2008-12-17T20:17:00.002+08:00

I was just watching a video that my dad took while we were carolling, and I realized just how much I loved singing and blessing with music. And now I realize that there are only 4 more days of carolling. I'll treasure it :)

Christmas Carolling!

2008-12-06T21:14:00.002+08:00

Hey everybody! Christmas is coming! and we're carolling, so come whenever you're free to watch us!
15th Dec
1230-1300 @ Prudential Tower
1330-1400 @ Equity Plaza
16th Dec
1245-1315 @ Keppel Tower
17th Dec
1230-1300 @ Capital Square
1315-1345 @ Samsung Hub
18th Dec
1245-1315 @ Ocean Tower
19th Dec
1230-1300 @ Samsung Hub
1330-1400 @ One Raffles Quay
22nd Dec
1230-1300 @ Capital Square
1330-1400 @ One Raffles Quay
23rd Dec
1245-1315 @ Keppel Bay Tower

Sarawak- living in a longhouse

2008-11-25T22:34:00.000+08:00

Sarawak was great! I miss my students..

OCIP

2008-11-16T20:00:00.001+08:00

I'll be going to Sarawak from tomorrow until 24th November, so I guess, I'll put this post here or the blog will be quite inactive for a while. Anyway, we're going there to teach English to some Primary school students, and worked very hard to prepare for it. I suppose I'll have fun. See ya all!

2008-11-04T23:22:00.004+08:00

Here's an update I owe many people, especially for those old friends faithfully checking back. Promos are over (if you haven't realized), so is Chinese, which I'm quite confident of passing this time round, I'll tell the story next time, perhaps later if I have time. PW's oral presentation is on Thursday, which, to me seems so inconsequential compared to Chinese. Yup, but I'll do it. I'll be leaving for Sarawak for Overseas CIP on 17th to teach some children English, well at least, to use English properly. And then, I might be OGL, which I'm still unsure of, and will be taking Physics H3 next year on relativity and quantam mechanics. Oh yeah, I'll be carolling too this december, I'll give the details soon!

I really do quite a bad job at talking about my life huh? I guess that's why I don't usually do it on my blog. These things are not that interesting, or to be concerned about. They're just passing moments of a really short life. What matters is eternity, which we all should be looking towards.

Alright, here's the story of Chinese. I'll rush it and go do my lessons for OCIP... I was studying the day before, reading the passages that were not tested yet, and attempted to practice them. Well, I ended up practicing only one of the ten passages and reading 4. It was already 11pm, so I gave up and told God to do whatever, and do His stuff like He always does. I guess I knew He would, having gone through this many times, though the first time I'm telling anyone now. I read the Bible before I slept, and God led me to Isaiah 40:12, 29-31.

¹² Who has measured the waters in the hollow of his hand,
or with the breadth of his hand marked off the heavens?
Who has held the dust of the earth in a basket,
or weighed the mountains on the scales
and the hills in a balance?

²⁹ He gives strength to the weary
and increases the power of the weak.

³⁰ Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall;

³¹ but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.

I'll say truthfully, after I read it, I felt I could get an A for Chinese. But it was not the grade that mattered anymore. God reminded me of His strength, compared to the rest of the world and the world's problems. They are nothing. And my fear vanished totally. I don't care what grade I'll get, I know His strength is enough, and I'll continue to run without weariness, to walk strong-heartedly.

The next day was Chinese, and when I got the paper 2, the first thing I saw was the exact questions I did while practicing for the 1 out of 10 passages that could be tested. And I just laughed. Silently of course.. For about 5 mins. The examiners standing around might have thought I went mad.. haha..

Later in the week, God prompted me to keep my promise, the promise I made the night before the paper. I would give a testimony when the results are out, because I know I don't have to fear it in the Name of the Lord. Well, this one's a preview.

I just realized I also don't often post testimonies here. I suppose it turned out quite well.. better than narrating my life..

Following the right people

2008-11-01T22:50:00.002+08:00

Humans are so easily swayed by the opinions of others. Definitely, most part of it boils down to charisma, persuasion and reasoning. But then, what do we follow. In a world where everyone has individual thoughts and beliefs, we do not know sometimes what the right thing to do is. Just like Eve offered the apple to Adam. Adam had a choice to accept it, and he did, changing the fate of the rest of the human population that followed. So now then, everyday people offer us choices. What do we do? What do we base our actions on? There will be no two people with the same measure of a similar value. Even if I, for instance value peace, others too value peace, but may prioritize hope over peace. We have very different expectations of ourselves and of others. But the only actions we can directly determine are our own. And we determine them according to God's word. Because His Word is constant and everlasting. It is never-changing, never compromising, like Him. And when we base our judgements and values on His Word, we will never fail to succeed in everything we do. Even if we have failed in the eyes of the world, we have succeeded in the Lord. - Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous.. Do not let the book of the law depart from you, do not turn from it to the left or the right. Be careful to do everything written in it, so that you may be successful where ever you go, and in whatever you do.

pre-holidays

2008-10-26T00:09:00.002+08:00

School's officially ended. But, well not really. Like the Chinese paper is this Thursday, and I'm not sure I can pass. But putting that aside, holidays after that will be kind of packed. OCIP will take up 9 days of November, and Choir, as usual. I guess those are the main highlights of the holidays, and I'll be catching up on this years work, so I'll be studying, plus extra physics because of h3.
It's quite fun having lots of things to do, but the price is the stress of time. For me, I live each day planning for it the night before, so catch me when you can..

deception, hypocrisy, is me.

2008-10-12T19:52:00.003+08:00

Deception, what a religion of the world. Consciously or not, all of us subscribe to it, even in the tiniest of matters. We deceive ourselves, to believe in what we believe. And after layers and layers of self-confirmation, that once simple thought, that deduction from the 1% of our brains transforms into a 'value' we hold so fast to. People by nature are egoistic, we twist our views to conform to our benefit. If not for our gain, then for the sake of edifying what we think is right. Then now I look at the world, and look at the suffering, the pain, the evil, the sins. What is right? Does the world even know that? Perhaps what they believe right, is just a result of a majority of people sharing the same beliefs. They group together and form a leadership. Soon, the rest of the human population follows blindly, satisfied with the lack of the need for thought, and for their conscience. As long as they do what the world thinks is right, they are right. And then, how about those other people? Those who set off bombs and crash planes. They too, had a belief, and this same belief brought these people together. They formed a leadership, gathered supporters, and carried out what was righteous to them. So now then, what's correct? What's pure? 'Right', is now subjective. It is defined in relation to what a person feels for. Everyone is different, then there's no constant to compare our actions to.

I believe I am a hypocrite. Being such a critic on the actions of others, yet doing the same things, just not showing them. I am a human. I believe I am egoistic, to the point that I can make claims about others, yet deny their justification for myself. Now I don't deny them. I am indeed what I make out others to be. Perhaps just a little more aware of the likes of this world, and having the ability of criticize the human race. But if I were to remain just like that, not making amends, stubbornly holding on to my views in order to aggrandize the basis of my actions, then am I no different from everyone else? What is right?

promos over

2008-10-07T00:49:00.002+08:00

Oh well, promos are kind of over. It was fun in a way. Next it's back to school, and pw, and chinese. And I don't really have much to say now. So here's the end of the post.

happy birthday to me!

2008-10-04T00:15:00.004+08:00

Yay, it's my birthday, and I'm trying to force myself to stop facebooking and study physics, which happens to supposed to be my best subject, and also happens to be the subject I've somewhat neglected until today. Well, thanks to the 12 am birthday wishers, and in advance, those who are gonna do it at 11:59 pm. You guys are probably the ones who read my blog anyway, the number of you I always try to estimate and fail when I constantly discover the efficiency of google and the internet.

Oh well, half the J1's are celebrating the unofficial end of promos, since spa is too easy to be considered, and the other half are either slacking because of no hope, which is a very wise decision, or desperately trying to refresh one year's worth of formulas and definitions. I've always believed in understanding, but for exams, I don't have a choice but to practice. The time limit destroys the meaning of Physics as a comprehension of knowledge and turns it into "how fast your brain and hand can work'. But I suppose it's necessary, or we'll be in the exam hall all day as I derive every single formula from a raw understanding.

I'm seeming to like long sentences more and more, which is quite bad. Anyway, ACJC open house is next wednesday!, come for it people, sec 4 or not..

Oh yeah, I was considering moving to wordpress, should I? haha..

Mid promos

2008-09-30T18:26:00.003+08:00

It's the middle of promos! And I'm here blogging. Actually I've been spending a lot of time on the com, studying econs was really a bore.. oh wait, I didn't really study much anyway. So, a few papers have gone by quite quickly, Chem, which was quite okay, Econs- my lucky dip, Chinese, surprisingly got me more confident of A lvls, and GP, the same as usual, the dunno whether pass or fail kind of feeling. Hah, but it doesn't really matter. Everyday, as I read the Bible, the Lord tells me again and again, without fail, to trust in His faithfulness. And it's not just before the exams, or when I'm feeling stressed, He assures me everyday, everytime I read His word. Which makes me look forward to opening that book now. Talking with Him is a pleasure, listening to issues I need to address, and consulting on what I have to do. God's like my interactive GPS system, well, more like a map that can talk, because I don't really trust my dad's gps thingy, but maps are more definite.

Some part of me behind all this exam moods just can't wait for everything to end. There's so much I want to do after promos. Okay, let's not talk about chinese and PW. And I can't wait for choir to start again.. It's carolling! all of you must come and watch us ya? Oh, and I'll be going to Sarawak for OCIP, if I havent said before, which I think I have, but we'll be teaching english to primary school kids, haha, gonna be fun. Well, until then, I'll still be studying, most assuredly.

studying for promos

2008-09-16T22:52:00.003+08:00

I've tried 3 different kinds of openings for this post, and they all didn't seem right. and finally, I settled with talking about it. Probably many now would think that I'm fretting over my promos, the things probably dreaded most by JC1s. But somehow, I'm just studying calmly. And for some reason, I don't see the importance of doing well in the exams. Not that I don't want to, any normal human would work towards success. But my studies are just not the main focal point of my life. To me, it's just an avenue for God to work through, so that I can do other things for Him. I've yet to find out what, but I'm sure it'll happen, and I'll just wait, and do well in what I do. I wonder sometimes, if I didn't have God in my life, how would it be? Based on logical and practical deductions, I'll probably be at a loss of what to do, with more than half of my subjects not studied, and counting on luck to do well for econs. It's almost a week to promos, and I'll probably fail. But the wonderful things about God is that He just defies all these logics and maths. And doing well in promos is just such a normal and easy thing to do to me now. I'm amazed even by how much faith I have in Him sometimes, to this point when everything depends on Him. I guess, what can I say? Thank you Lord.

The inner depths of the mind

2008-09-06T21:48:00.002+08:00

Everyone is insane. At least to some extent. In fact, it is just because we are all different, that's why we regard others as insane. They simply differ in their ways of thinking from us. The more it differs, the weirder they are. For example, I have a friend who thinks that everyone around her is weird. Every single action we do that is not her norm, she'll say we're weird. So the larger the extent we are away from her norm, the weirder we are to her. Thus, we all just regard her as weird herself, born to exist in the wrong world totally. But, if we think about it, aren't we all like her? Sometimes people do things that we think are not normal, so we don't like to be seen around them, are try to hide when they do something we consider "abnormal". But to them, their actions are perfectly sane. They see reason for it and do it. But we have different minds and think in other ways. So we get confused by the actions of others. So what's wrong with my friend then? She simply expresses her thoughts more outwardly than us, because in fact, we probably also call others "weird" too, just that we don't say it. Ultimately, it's just another case of relativity.

God's purpose in AC

2008-09-05T20:30:00.002+08:00

Early this year, one of my friends was leaving for NJ, and she told me to stay in AC because she said that God had a purpose for me here. So I just took that and believed so, waiting for Him to call. Many things have happened, changing classes, getting to know more people, joining the choir, and learning so much from it. Going overseas for tour, joining the comm. And now, He has shown me what to do. It just came so clearly, like a flash of light, and I just knew God was speaking to me. When I listened, I realized that everything had happened this whole year was just a part of what God wants me to do in this school. It all just fell into place. Even as much as being a bass was one of the steps to enable me to do His work here. And now I know why I'm here. I want to do it.

People's impressions

2008-08-15T22:31:00.003+08:00

Sometimes people get wrong impressions of oyu, or they misunderstand what you said, causing them to look at you differently. Sometimes some of these people influence others to think the same way about you, and you can;t really do anything about it right? But my life isn't about them. I choose to see it as an issue between God and I. So all the actions I do serves solely the purpose of letting God have a good impression of me, in other words, pleasing Him. So it doesn't matter if the way people respond or talk to you suggests a view that they may have towards you. I personally can feel prejudice in some of their words and responses. But then, I'll just serve sincerely, because I want to. And not because of whatever reasons those people can think of. I serve God.

2008-08-14T21:03:00.002+08:00

Alright! I finally can blog again! Because I'm very sick and probably don't have to go for lessons tmr. Means don't have to rush homework!
Well I realized how I havent posted properly since elections. My posts are so random that I don't even know what a 'proper' post is anyway.
Hm, during the past month or so, some interesting things happened!
I revelated that the world should install solar panel on the floors so that we can conserve energy! Then the light we use will serve 2 purposes! And we should install sound energy converters at construction sites too!
The tests have so far been okay. I think I did better than usual for my chinese compo! Let's hope I don't just pass this time round..
Oh yeah guys! Tomorrow at the CPA at 430 an American band will be playing for CF! and you don't have to be in CF to go so I hope to see you there! anyway anyone can come for CF anytime! For me it's like my destresser from the week where I just throw everything to God and just rest in His presence!

The only things in this world you can control are you actions. And every action will cause both positive and negative effects. So just do what you see is the best, and let the world solve the problems that follow after with their own actions.

Faeries, Gnomes, Dwarves..

2008-08-10T22:50:00.004+08:00

I wish I were still a child
Living in a world of faeries and tales
The only thing I would worry about were evil witches
And all the world would be a happy place

I wouldn't know of all this pain in the world
I wouldn't have feelings denied
I wouldn't know of all this suffering of others
And 'would' will be a definite word

Then we'll be naive as little children
We'll live in the world of fairytales
We'll get rid of those evil witches
And then there'll be a happily ever after.

How many times?

2008-08-07T23:13:00.000+08:00

If only there wasn't such a thing as suffering in this world...

I guess that's why I'm human.

Worse than O lvls?

2008-07-27T18:42:00.003+08:00

I've been really busy, enough not to have time to blog since election day. But we'll leave those depressing things(PW, homework, and CA) aside. The J2s have left choir, so now it's just my batch. I thought we'd do okay, which I've yet to find out, but hopefully will.
I don't really have much to talk about.. nothing's been happening, just school, choir, church.

Nomination Results

2008-07-15T19:55:00.002+08:00

I was at peace when I saw the nomination results today. It was rather expected. Probably what I'd have expected from God, He's revealed His plan for me. So I was kind of very happy when I saw my name under R&R, but bewildered when I saw it under PM too. I don't know what the PM thing is about but I guess I'll trust God for it. Personally, I like R&R better :)

I was thinking about the usual people that hang out. And about how this clique started. It was a love for the choir that brought us together. We all had tendencies to start singing parts in the middle of nowhere, to laugh about almost anything. To talk endlessly about the choir and our fellow choristers. It was this love that made us hang around after choir practices, be super enthusiastic about everything choir, that made us find each other. I used to think that cliques were terrible. But I don't mind this. We're open to people joining in our fellowship, well, at least I know I am. Ac has made me realize how much I treasure relationships, how much I enjoy being able to find a personal link between people and me. That probably why I find joy in being able to build up people's lives, being there to help them, to know them well. What better a position but being the guidance for a cell group? It's truly amazing how God uses my personality to help people, and I enjoy it!

If you're in choir and reading this, it's somewhat about what I'm gonna say tomorrow, so don't get bored..

Losing Weight?

2008-07-05T00:15:00.002+08:00

My BMI is officially 14. And my pe teacher told me to gain 2 kg asap and show her... i really dunno how I'm gonna do that. Well, maybe its possible.. I've gone to swensen's 3 times in less than a month with the choir people.. and I'm sort of going broke..
I'm quite back to photoshop, so the link to the other blog is on the profile page. I won't update it as regularly as this, it takes a long time for a thought to materalize into a piece of art.. :)
I shall make a resolution now, to make sure I don't fail, you guys must remind me. I will stop going for super late night dinner/suppers.. haha.. and spend less money on food. And start really studying for promos. And go out more with the other choir people. Stop taking cabs unnecessarily. Hang around guys more to stop those irritating scandals that mysteriously start every few months. um. Try to stop the j1s from leaving choir, as many have seem to. And I'll get A for physics.

2008-06-29T23:23:00.002+08:00

Things that I have to let go in faith. To trust God so easily in patience. It's not easy at all. I really do not understand why this person is in my life, or has got anything to do with it. But since God put her there, I guess I'll find out sooner or later. Maybe I'll never find out, but there has to be a reason, so I'll thank God for her.
And I don't bother now about who's visiting this blog, after I found out a lot of interesting people do without tagging. Have fun then! hahah..
If you didn't know, every time I post something like what you see below, it's usually something I'm going to teach or share in church. So I thought I'll type it here to bless all my readers, and to revise it as well :)
To pray in faith- Is to believe that God will answer your prayer. But it has to be God's will that he answers our prayer. Then what's the point of praying? We might as well tell God to give us everything He wants to give us and do what He wants us to do. You probably need a great deal of faith to do that. But "ask and it will be given unto you, seek and you will find". We have to fellowship with God as Christians. That's the point of being His disciple. (I deleted 3 sentences here because I sidetracked.. bad habit..) So, through our communication, we find out from God His will, then we pray and ask Him for it in faith. Faith to trust that He will give it to us, and faith to trust that it is the best for us, because truthfully, I don't get what God does sometimes, as you would have seen in the earlier part of this post. Anyways, I'll stop here now, though I starting to get in the mood.. I'll continue again next time! God bless you all...

Terms over

2008-06-27T23:06:00.002+08:00

Yeah, terms are over. Now I have to do homework.. haha.. I didn't really feel a stress difference. I suppose I was stressed in the first place.. Anyway, yesterday I was studying Physics really hard at night, like in the really serious mood. Then I suddenly received a message from Jasmine, and couldn't help laughing out loud when I read it, it was really refreshing.. haha, here it is, if she doesn't mind..
"Hello yello bello! ALL THE BEST FOR PHYSICS TMR!hoho throw coconuts and watermelons and ace that exam!(: impossible is nothang(:"
Okay, I dunno if I'm weird for finding that funny, but it was like a total opposite of what I was doing at the moment. So thank God for friends like her.. haha..

Terms, half of it.

2008-06-24T20:06:00.002+08:00

Halfway through term exams, thank God so much for His assurance
I was at peace during GP
I was still at peace during Chinese . By God's grace, I managed to understand the last of the 4 compo topics, and it was quite fun to write too!
I was peaceful during Maths. It wasn't as difficult as everyone said it was.
I was peaceful during Chem, though it was a really long paper and almost no one finished it. Thank God I finished it.

There are so many things in my life these days that are directly related to God. Everything. What I do, What I give. I just want to serve Him more now, knowing how much I rely on Him everyday. So much that when I don't talk to Him for too long, I would probably feel really terrible and can't sleep at night. So it's a good thing He's everywhere huh? haha..

Same timetable,..

2008-06-22T19:23:00.002+08:00

My time-table for next term didn't change.. That kind of sucks.. Still ending school at the latest time possible for everyday. Well, I guess it could be worse.. though I seriously don't know how..

Bob Browning

2008-06-21T00:31:00.002+08:00

Alright people, especially Acsians, haha. Look at the guy the green hat! He's Bob Browning, the great, great grandson of Robert Browning. In case you're wondering, Robert Browning was the guy that came up with our motto- "The Best is Yet to Be". It was really coincidental that we met him! We were on tour at one of the palaces in Austria, and he was a guide there. So he spotted the ACS crest on our sweaters and approached us!.. haha.. Never thought this kind of thing could happen..

no tour photos here..

2008-06-18T16:46:00.002+08:00

Heh, I guess I won't post tour photos here since they're all already on facebook. It's more interesting to view them there anyway, with all the comments. If you don't already have a facebook account, go get one! You'll probably regret it after you fail your exams, but it worth it :)

Terms are next week, and I'm surprisingly calm. I'm struggling with the last 3 topics of Chem, just starting to revise maths, and haven't touched Physics. I really dunno what's gonna happen to my chinese, GP should be okay. And I resigned to just reading my econs notes. Well, I don't really have a choice, tour took up 2 weeks, but I'll definitely regret it less than if facebook caused me to fail my exams terribly.

Sin, Suffering, Peace, Patience, Faith

2008-06-10T22:51:00.003+08:00

As Christians, we are bound to be tested sometime. What better a way to do that than to make us suffer? Suffering in this world is caused by a few definite things. One, it is caused directly by the devil, when God allows it. The other type of suffering is caused by us. People sometimes ask why there is so much suffering in this world, if there is a God. Isn't it simple? We have freedom of choice. We are faced with choices every minute we are conscious. If we make the wrong choice, we suffer the consequences, or someone else does. So if God were to stop all this suffering, we'll probably have to right to choose. Then we will all be like robots living in a perfect world. Well then what's the point of creating us? If we do not have the freedom to choose, we cannot choose to love. Then I guess I'll take back the word "perfect". The world wouldn't be good or bad. It would be useless.
Since no one is perfect, we will all have to suffer at some point in our lives. Well at least we have freedom of choice, so lets play that trump card. There are only two ways we can go. To turn away from God or to trust Him even more. I probably won't elaborate on the former, I don't feel qualified to talk about it yet. Everyone says, "Have faith in God". And then they quote Jeremiah 29:11, about God's perfect plan. I've heard it so many times. But do we all get it? What is faith? In the Bible, faith is believing in the things unseen. There is no other word to describe it. Anyway I'm sure you all know it. In our case, we have faith in God. We have faith in His plan. But then, the bridge between overcoming suffering and faith is missing. It is patience. Overcoming suffering requires patience. When people are unchangeable, we need patience with them not to make worse the situation. And this patience requires faith. When problems are unexplainable, like what happened to Job, we need patience to wait for God to reveal his plan. And this patience requires faith. So now then, know that God will not test us beyond our limits, and we can always choose to have faith in Him.

2008-06-08T18:00:00.002+08:00

My new internet speed.. how good is this? haha, I don't really know..

2008-06-06T22:56:00.000+08:00

We should do this sometime in Singapore.. Thanks Jiayin for the vid!

Back from choral tour

2008-06-06T14:21:00.002+08:00

Okay, bad timing. Moved house 2 days before tour, so I was internet-deprived. Anyway, I'm back, and I'm missing Vienna. I'll post photos once I feel like, now I'm just enjoying those memories. One thing I found really interesting during the tour was the european churches. They were not only Roman-Catholic, but some had a mix of different religions and cults, resulting in weird statues and gargoyles, murals here and there. Some of them will be in the photos. I'm sort of looking forward to choir rehearsals now. After spending 10 days with my friends I can't help but miss their company now..

5 days to tour!

2008-05-21T21:07:00.002+08:00

If people check a blog frequently for updates, and sees the same thing at the top everyday for 11 days, what would they want to see? It cannot be a narrative sentence, or a thought of mine. It must be something that can be read again and again, provoking thought or sparking interest. I shall think of it soon and post it before I leave on Monday. You won't expect it. I think. I might be able to access the internet anyway.

It's 5 days to tour. I haven't even gone yet, but I know I'm going to enjoy it. Any alternative from school life right now really appeals to me. Then I can come back and study properly for term exams. And then I can finally, finally, go for CF properly in the morning and on Fridays coz choir won't be that tiring anymore. Some part of me wants to enjoy the tour, some wants the holidays feeling satisfied as I catch up on school, some wants school to start again and be able to enjoy it like I did in PAE. School hasn't even ended yet... I'm thinking too far.

When I'm down and disappointed, I talk to Hope. Just sounds so appropriate. She never fails to give me hope again. Maybe that's why she's here.

Sacrifices for God- taking responsibilities

2008-05-16T21:50:00.002+08:00

I just accepted some heavy responsibilities. It just came so suddenly from a phone call, and without thinking, God probably made me agree. I just said yes, without considering school, cca, or relationships. I now realize what the trial was for. If this came before sunday I probably wouldn't have accepted it. I'm not going to think back, nor regret it. But of course, this would mean many sacrifices. But I think I'll leave promotion to God, He decides in the end, and not what I do well. So I shan't dwell anymore on what I've given up.

I had a rehearsal in the new CPA today, for the official opening of it. The sound was really bad, the walls were decorated with some contemporary modern theme, so the resound was quite bad. Made us sound like hitting a cymbal that couldn't vibrate. But I guess we would strive to work harder to be heard, then when we perform in better conditions we'll be better.

10 more days to tour! Can't wait, doing so much for the choir.

INFJs don't blog about their lives.

2008-05-15T22:51:00.002+08:00

Played ultimate frisbee this morning during pe. Was trying to catch it when someone else crashed into me, causing my thumb muscle to go limp. I had a GP test today and I couldn't write! So I bandaged it to fix it into place to prevent it from moving, and managed to force myself to write. It still hurts now, ouch.. This is probably one of the rare few times I'm posting about what happened in my life. And it's a minor event, without any 'meaning' behind it. If you've been around here long enough, you would have realized that I never narrate. I really wonder what made me do it today. Oh wait, I guess doing it caused me to type the last 3 sentences, which is probably the philosophy behind the post.

Here's something interesting, I took a personality test in school called the MBTI quite a long time ago. Apparently, I'm a rare guy, of 0.5% in the world. Okay that was just to make me feel good. I'm supposed to be a nice guy, somewhat introverted to people, but extraverted to closer friends, and they are few. I learn better by self-enlightenment, that is, after meditating about an issue for a long time by myself. The opposite would be people who need to discuss stuff and talk about it to internalize. And er, I stick strongly to my values and principles, they're the first priority in my life. Cannot work well in emergencies because I focus too much on the big picture rather than details, so I would feel overwhelmed by the sudden stress. Those were just a few points I find true, there are others but whatever, no one should be that interested in me.

According to the profile, my future job should be- Social worker, Psychologist, Religious- oriented job, teacher.

For you alone, Lord, deserve all glory.

2008-05-11T22:18:00.003+08:00

You are the peace that guards my heart, my help in time of need.

You are the hope that leads me on, and brings me to my knees.

For there I find You waiting. And there I find release.

I'll worship You with all my heart, I will sing unto You

For You alone Lord, You deserve all glory, and You deserve all my praise.

Father we worship and adore You, we long to see Your face.

For You alone deserve all glory, and all praise.

I realized I really can't bear isolation from God. Thank You Lord, for not prolonging that trial. Thanks for letting me go back to you so quickly.

JC changes people

2008-05-11T20:06:00.002+08:00

JC changes people. I'm feeling quite normal now with tests this week, assignments, especially chinese ones due, project stuff that I'm rushing last minute. And I have CCA on monday, wednesday, thursday, friday, and saturday! What a big change from one day a week last year. If this happened last year I would probably have collapsed due to exhaustion. And I'm even blogging now. Somehow, God makes everything work out in the end, so why bother to be worried about such minor things?

Have been browsing a blogs of some old friends lately, realized that many JC guys have given up their lives(I never said it's a bad thing) and become attached. I really wonder why, maybe I should study sociology, if it's even related.. At least I don't forsake my friends for a particular member of the opposite sex. Like it's even possible for me to do that anyway, haha, with such a lousy timetable, I'm gonna get sick of seeing my classmates from 8-430 everyday. I really don't know how to express my disgust over my timetable. It's like the worst of all the JC1 classes. I still wonder how I was even convinced to take 4 H2s. If you know why, don't tell me, I don't want to be reminded of how my personality of INFJ failed me and caused me to be so easily influenced. Okay, actually I don't regret it. Haa, I was just releasing my hatred for my timetable, feeling much better now.

I wanna see all my old friends soon... Maybe after choir tour.

YES!! I'm going to VIENNA and SLOVAKIA!! haha, okay can't wait to get a break from this life man, seriously.

The BOys' Brigade

2008-05-05T22:30:00.002+08:00

I was writing an essay about the aims of education, and happened to use the object of the Boys' Brigade as an example of how education teaches us how to live, not just make a living. That made me think of the 8 years of being a BB boy. Argh!, I miss BB, seriously. Everything about it, rushing to change after school, falling in properly, the p&w, the games, lessons, whatever. I still remember all the target badge test stuff that I memorized. The memories of hiking for who knows how long as a recruit, then doing it again, as a sec 4. I probably contributed to the speed at which the biscuit tins in the bb room emptied, haha. I wish I could go back for once soon. Wanted to join primers at first, but lessons end at 430 everyday and a super crazy cca, I'll be surprised if I even have a choice.

Some things we probably find we enjoy now, as if it were something we wished for that came true. Choir was one thing that happened. I still enjoy it, but it's like a modern type of enjoyment. A new thing. I never thought of BB as something like that before. But thinking of it now, it's like a longing to go back to secondary school where you can mug the day before tests and get full marks, enjoying everyday. Truly, you never know what you've had until you've lost it. I WANT TO GO BACK, SOMEONE INVITE ME BACK QUICK... anyway I haven't collected my O level cert.. haha,.

2008-05-04T20:50:00.003+08:00

If only everyone in the world could enjoy this peace, the joy that surpasses all understanding. It surpasses all understanding not because it sounds really cool, but it just does. It's a state of mind, body, spirit, and soul in their optimum levels. A knowledge of purpose of your life and a sense of security. It is an indescribable feeling of happiness everyday, no matter what happens, nothing can change your mood.

I never read my posts after I've typed them. So forgive me if there are english errors. I find my posts very boring to read again. Every thought I put in here is a result of a lot of thinking and analysis of things that have happened. So it would be quite ridiculous if I were to read the product, when the whole process has already gone through my mind.

I need to do chinese homework. I will do chinese homework. and I will pass chinese this year. Seriously. Poly people I know you're laughing at me. Z. One the the fews things I have to force myself to do.

for teachers to get the hint..

2008-04-29T17:46:00.001+08:00

I AM STRESSED. THERE'S SO MUCH WORK TO DO, AND WE HAVE SO LITTLE TIME TO DO THEM. Come on teachers, use google to find my blog and take the hint............

morning singing, and lol~

2008-04-26T22:13:00.002+08:00

Every morning, the choir sings before assembly. I'm sure everyone in the school knows that by now. The original idea was to practice during common breaks to improve our songs for competition. But now we do it during breaks + mornings. At first, practicing on our own really did help, we learnt a lot from the j2s, and we had a lot of fun as well, laughing at stupid mistakes and crappy stuff that we did. Well, haha, I guess now it's still fun, but I really wonder what the purpose of practicing so much is now. Every time we meet, I know there are only 2 ways the session can go, having organized and co-ordinated so many. One is we have fun singing together, the camaraderie- with people who all love singing to express ourselves. But I realize we don't learn much, or really improve. And that's usually the case. Now, when I ask them for a song to sing, it's not really- "Let's sing this because we need to improve", but "Let's sing this because it's a fun song, or it's my favourite song". As a j1, I know we all sing to the standard of 'good enough to please our seniors', but we still have fun together. So now, what's the point? Are we waking up earlier everyday to make our seniors happy and psychologically influence them to think that we do very well during rehearsals? Or do we in the first place? To tell the truth, we don't give our best during these informal practices. Even I find myself out of focus sometimes. I know we can do, because we have done it. But only during rehearsals, when we don't really have a choice but to do well in front of our instructor. But then again, if we become too serious, the practices may lose their fun. The reason for wanting to do it will be different, but still positive, if you consider having fun good. But if we tell them directly, let's sing with our best efforts and strive to improve each time, must concentrate, must do it correctly, must remember what the instructor told us, cannot make the same mistakes. Lines heard all too often. Then I can literally feel the 'great, not again' aura from all of them, but then, we do strive for our best after that. We really want to give to the choir. So, if we do that every practice, we'll probably win every competition. I hope that's the purpose that every j1 has, to win for the choir.

Having a low-profile blog is a good thing sometimes, haha...

post #201

2008-04-21T00:03:00.002+08:00

This is post #201
I realized I haven't posted for really, really long. Life's been busy, as usual. I was found that out when someone asked me "How's life?" And I thought it was the best question I've heard in the week. And I still here posting because I got tired of econs. Econs is like >< it's contributing to 90% of the stress I'm having now. Project with such a near dateline, tutor who's super strict on homework, I think she's worse than my maths tutor who sends anyone who doesnt do 5 questions in advance to detention. With so much going on at once that I don't even know what I'm doing sometimes, thank God I know God.

Anyway, happy 201th post to my readers. It's to my readers and not my blog because you guys keep this blog going, not me. So thanks! One day I want to read the all the previous posts and laugh at how immature I once was. And one thing I know is that some of you have been reading since then, and will laugh with me when the time comes, haha.

2008-04-07T20:09:00.001+08:00

The greatest love that anyone could ever know

That overcame the cross and grave to find my soul
And 'til I see You face to face and grace amazing takes me home
I'll trust in You

I will live to love You
I will live to bring You praise
I will live a child in awe of You

Fine> so here's funorama

2008-04-01T21:42:00.003+08:00

OKAY people. I will stop talking about choir and and blog about fun-o-rama. To tell the truth, when I enjoy something a lot, I rarely talk about it, but enjoy the thoughts by myself, I guess that's why MBTI says I'm an introvert, but I don't really care.

Came to school at 6 on saturday, prepared stuff until 9. Some kids came really early. But I wasn't there, haha. I was checking the stuff out in the hall. Bought 2 shirts which cost 30 bucks each. Ok, so that's $210 more to get rid of. I wasn't really interested in the games, but just played around with some friends here and there, not really taking any prizes. They were all giving sweets anyways, maybe I was just lousy. Somehow when I played all the dart games, even those no-brainer ones where you can just close eyes and throw and win something, I hit nothing at all. It was like !!! I hit every part of the board except the balloons! Okay. So the rest of the coupons were spent on lemonade from my stall, a pink AC bear which I'm currently trying to get rid of, an AC notebook. Er, well, I can't really remember. The haunted house was just okayy.. Not as great as people said it was. Oh! I met a lot of old people there! Old as in like fairsians that I haven't seen since O level results. And Mrs Choe was there with her husband, but didn't see any other teachers.

It's been more than one and a half years, since that august. Firstly, I need to assure the people who know about it that I'm completely fine, so you don't have to get overly-paranoid when I post some not so happy feelings. I'm human and I have different kinds of emotions besides happy, though I usually am, right>? haha.

fun-o-rama@!!

2008-03-29T23:40:00.003+08:00

Hm. Today I found out a lot of people visit this blog, just that they don't say it.

Fun-o-Rama was fun.

Of course.. haha...

Who wants a pink AC bear?

Okay, I don't usually post like this but I can't help it. So tired just now I almost sent out an sms saying I'm Joel from base.. For those who don't get it, you're worse.

Bye people...

Jasmine I can't believe you forgot again...

-.-, really. And I mean it...

Life has got better, after prayer..

2008-03-23T22:12:00.002+08:00

Yes!>!>!.. I finally refound my purpose and got back my discipline to study!! Thanks to those people who prayed for me. Now I just need to get well from my flu, heard mass PE is 2.4.

And people! If you're interested or can appreciate music> come to the ACJC choir concert on the 6th July! Tickets can be bought from me at $20, $27 and $32. I assure it will be worth if. Sometimes during choir rehearsals even I feel like stopping and listening to the others, because it's beautiful.. It's on a Sunday night at the Esplanade, tell me if you're interested ya?

Now that I've refreshed my thinking of life, my mind is much clearer. Things that used to bother me, stress me out don't anymore. Somehow, being a Christian and knowing God has a plan for me is not enough. I must continually rediscover that amazing knowledge again and again to keep my motivation at a constant high. I discussed theology and it's principles with AMY in roxy today, and I realized there's a lot more the YPM can be. Many younger youths don't understand why they worship God, or what the Holy Communion is about. Looks like the prayer list will be longer.

~Let's see, I have 50 Chinese phrases to memorize, so bye~

my choir prac and gp..

2008-03-20T20:31:00.002+08:00

The choir practice I organised turned out pretty well, then some J2s joined us to help, so we could identify our mistakes.. I realised the basses like working with the sops, because both our sections are so crappy we can totally link. The altos are not bad either, just that they're much more serious than us. Then the funny thing is, we just can't link with the tenors. It's like so weird and quiet if we're practising with them, the basses crap with ourselves, and they are just too stone. Well, at least they sing well, much better than us. Today I also realised how behind the basses are from the rest of the sections. I'll try to memorize karimatanu by tomorrow..- as in I will, haha. I'm starting to like choir more than I thought I would..

what now? to or not to.

2008-03-19T20:29:00.002+08:00

I give up. Every time I think of doing so, I feel much happier and lighter. But the presence of longing to keep pursuing still exists, somewhere in there, until I really get over it. I know I haven't really given up, I can't do it spontaneously, but I hope I achieve it soon. It's tiring- on and off, and on and off. I need to enjoy life more and forget about these things. But if things do turn around before it happens, I might consider. But for now, I have better things to do..

Wisdom and interviews.

2008-03-09T22:57:00.003+08:00

When I was younger, I used to think that wisdom was the ideal understanding that was to be attained. It was a knowledge to me. An enhanced form of knowledge. But that was just one part of it. Wisdom is knowing and applying. It exists in the form of actions. We are wise not when we know what is right and wrong, but when we use our discernment to make the right decisions. Wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure. Because when it is pure, it triggers qualities and actions in our lives, such as being peace-loving. Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God's hand in their lives. The knowledge is primary, but the wanted result. The applied knowledge matters most. If you want to read more, it's in James 3:13-18. The beattitude is from Matthew 5.

I did manage to get into the overseas attachment programme interviews. I really hope it's God's plan for me because I do want to go. Interview is at 5 tomorrow. Was very stressed about it, but now I'm okay. Well ,thank God for bringing me so far anyway. Only 25 from the nation are accepted every year. I need to trust God. And I need to keep reminding myself that too. A few days ago I was extremely tired. Just tired of what was happening around. Interview, academics, results, leadership roles I'm not ready for. And they all came at once. But these sufferings come so that I can realise yet again that I'm helpless without God. Blessed are the poor in spirit, the theirs is the Kingdom of heaven. But when I gave them all to Him, it all became so very clear. I'm sort of at peace now. But them again, I'm still human, I'll be calmer after the interview ends. And if I manage to get some revision done.

The new house is ready! I should be moving in June. Then I can't walk to school anymore.. haha. Choir is getting longer. I hope it's not like that all the time. Still have 71 funfair coupons to sell. This is a desperate plea- please please buy from me, $800 is really impossible.

stressed.. really..

2008-03-07T23:27:00.000+08:00

I'm tired.

The future?

2008-03-02T21:54:00.002+08:00

The future>? Why do people talk about the future? How paradoxically ironic for me, the future, unpredictable yet so confirmed, decided. Life and Death, does it really matter? It does, because I was created for a purpose. The past the present, the future, just stop. There is no word to describe it. Just a feeling, no, not a feeling. It is knowledge. It is a piece of wisdom, an understanding that cannot be explained. But I know it so well. All that said, and I still wish I could see the future, so I know what to do now, what decision to make, what choice to choose. God help me.

2008-02-29T21:44:00.001+08:00

ACJC!!!!

orientation, and now..

2008-02-28T21:15:00.002+08:00

Haha.. orientation night~ I danced with a sop from choir called Joelle. Was so funny when we realised that. And I can't believe we're both in the first row, facing each other in choir and she didn't know me. My OG is now officially segregated. I know some of them might be reading this, but heck, I'm pissed and I'm gonna say it here. It was really so tiring trying to keep the OG together. The few people from O1 were so cliquish, that I felt really bad for the O2 guys when they tried to mix. I gave up eventually, so now we're sort of divided into 3 groups- The O1 and the crasher friends, the O2s and me, and the weird anti-socials who keep disappearing. Actually there's only one.

CF today was really great! I think I'm officially going to join Cf now, but that would be like 3 CCAs. It's really fun, even after it ended, when we were having dinner together, and trying to stretch our falsettos - there's a performance tomorrow, haha, if I don't recover, I'm screwed. Then when I was walking out to the gate with Lilin, she told me to be careful coz there was an escaped terrorist! haaha.. I didn't know what to say... Actually I didn't even know, I dont read the papers in the morning. I think if I were one of the police I'll be quite excited, first time something so exciting is happening in Singpore.

Okayy,, I'm singing tomorrow for founders day. The guys all look like waiters and the girls, flight stewardesses, in our no.2s. Will look really weird when I try to wax away my hair... To everone else, borrow a set of uniform and crash tomorrow!

back to my life

2008-02-24T20:03:00.001+08:00

Finally able to take some time off life to share it with you guys. Orientation 2 for AC just finished on friday, it was great as usual, I was afraid the new people will feel left out, but they were great!, was quite cool that they enjoyed the orientation night and the dancing, our OG is super enthusiastic about everything. But too bad some of them left with their own friends... I felt really good when they were telling me after the night ended that it was much better than their PAE JC's orientation.

Then was the BB anniversary. Like any other BB event, I obviously enjoyed it. Meeting my old friends from fairfield brought back many memorable memories. I can't help but really want to go back and join 33rd, but I've taken a long time to consider it already.. I'll definitely go back when I have time on Fridays.

After much prayer, the decision is to take 4 H2s. Don't criticize me yet!,, haha,. It's a wise choice. Since H1 and H2 econs will have the same J1 syllabus, I rather spend more time with the teacher to make sure my econs is pro, so next year I can focus more on Physics and Maths. Then I'll drop it to H1 and the end of the year, unless I'm really good and econs and love it, then I might forgo my life for a year with Physics H3 and Choir SYF.

Now I would like to ask a question: Why do we believe in a God who allows suffering? If He loves us so much, why is there evil in the world? This is actually to remind me to write about it the next time I have time/..

Death Sentence or not?

2008-02-16T21:53:00.002+08:00

Happy Valentine's Day, though I'm a bit late, was kinda busy the last few days. I'm not even supposed to be on my com, with my homework less than half done. But I really had an urge to 'write' about this topic - The death sentence, for it being on my mind for quite a long time already. For those who read my blog for my life, wait a while more.. haha, I still have undone tutorials.

The Old testament, which is really really old, really, had a lot of death sentences. And they were so severe that God struck them down himself. Laws in those times were very strict. If you don't watch yourself, you might end up blind, toothless, or limbs missing. The basic rule was- An eye for an eye. Anything you do wrong will be done to you. So I'm guessing many people died breaking laws. If we lived in those times, we'll probably be dead now.

But now, what I'm trying to say is, regardless of whether you refer to the Old testament or not, life is God-given, and He is the only person who can take it away. You would know my view now, that I do not agree with the death sentence. We no longer live in the Old testament, but the New. Jesus died so that we can be free of that bondage to laws. Our sins are forgiven the moment we commit them (of course you don't take it for granted). But his shows that God is willing to lets us live even after we sin. Somewhere in Romans, it says that if we break one law, or one commandment, it is considered as we broke all the other laws. If we lie, it means we've also committed murder, etc. Then should we all be subject to the death sentence? I will repeat, that only God can take away lives sonce He is the creator. Even committing suicide is sinning as we have no right to destroy God's creation, not to mention his greatest creation - humans. This is why I believe the death sentence is not justified for.

Death or not?? Citically ill person

2008-02-12T22:38:00.000+08:00

This happened quite a while ago, but I just thought deep into it recently. We were discussing in GP, say a relative or family member has become a vegetable, and the doctor doesn't know when he's gonna wake up, or he might not at all. So what are you supposed to do? Pull the plug or wait? If he's in critical condition, do you keep shocking him so that he keeps alive or just let him die?

My GP teacher asked us to discuss in terms of religion, and a few answered. I was sort of in a desperate need to pee, so I couldn't afford to focus my energies thinking. And I need to warn you now that the subsequent paragraphs might be of a certain level of abstacticity, even I could not find the right words to describe my view.

Now if someone is gonna die soon, his heart is weakening. The doctor asks the family members if they want to keep him alive. So the doctors zaps the guy(let's call him X) already in pain and about to die. You must remember that he is very close to his family, imagine waiting for someone close to leave the earth. My classmates view was to let the him die. I'm sure they understood how painful it would be for the family members, but subjecting the dying X to more pain is even worse, not to mention inhumane. The few Christians said that it's God will for them to leave the earth, so the family shouldn't try to control God's timing.

However, I do not totally agree with their point of view. God is almighty, and everything he plans happens. He is never wrong, and the time X dies is what God has already decided. So by saying that the family members try to control God's timing and manages to do it by zapping him, does that mean that God's plan has sheared a little since they decided to shock him so that he is alive for a few more seconds? I believe that God's plan has never gone wrong and will never do, so what I'm saying is that the family members trying to revive X is also part of what God has decided to happen already. Therefore, we cannot say what is right and what is wrong based on moral, emotional issues, but just know that it is supposed to happen. I'm not saying that when people do wrong things, they are right, just that the wrong choices they make were already decided, just that with their freedom of choice, they cause suffering. Now I know it sounds quite contradicting, but that can branch out to a totally different topic, and I promise it will come once I know more about it.

Okay, you people might be frustrated now that I didn't give a definite answer, so here's my personal choice. If I had the power to, I'll let him go. Because I know that he will be meeting our Creator, and God just wants him back, plus the suffering he would experience and all that mentioned above. If the person is a non-Christian, then I'll ask God for the choice to be made. Then now you may ask why I will not consult God if the person is a Christian. Well, actually I would, but at least if I didn't there's no harm done since life on earth is just a short stage of his life, the rest are in heaven. And if God wanted him alive, he won't die.

Something else I would like to post about is the death sentence. But since I have maths and econs to do, It'll wait. Remind me if I don't do it soon ok?

My funeral song..

2008-02-08T19:37:00.000+08:00

Affirmation - Savage Garden

I believe the sun should never set upon an argument
I believe we place our happiness in other people's hands
I believe that junk food tastes so good because it's bad for you
I believe your parents did the best job they knew how to do
I believe that beauty magazines promote low self esteem
I believe I'm loved when I'm completely by myself alone

I believe in Karma what you give is what you get returned
I believe you can't appreciate real love 'til you've been burned
I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side
I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye

I believe you can't control or choose your sexuality
I believe that trust is more important than monogamy
I believe your most attractive features are your heart and soul
I believe that family is worth more than money or gold
I believe the struggle for financial freedom is unfair
I believe the only ones who disagree are millionaires

I believe in Karma what you give is what you get returned
I believe you can't appreciate real love 'til you've been burned
I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side
I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye

I believe forgiveness is the key to your own happiness
I believe that wedded bliss negates the need to be undressed
I believe that God does not endorse tv evangelists
I believe in love surviving death into eternity

I believe in Karma what you give is what you get returned
I believe you can't appreciate real love 'til you've been burned
I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side
I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye
Until you say goodbye

I want this song to be played during my funeral yeah?? I'm taking the chance that some of my readers will die later than me.. haha..

2008-02-04T21:07:00.000+08:00

Now JC life is getting tiring... The only free afternoons I have on Mondays and Sundays. Night is usually spent on tutorials that I usually can't make sense of. The easiest homework now is probably GP, chinese and econs. Hahaa.. how ironic, I'm a science student and I don't get all of them.

Now people, tell me if I should change my H1 econs to H2 econs?? It's actually almost the same, so if I do well in it, it'll help in getting a scholarship. On the other hand, it's quite pointless since econs has nothing to do with what I'm gonna study. Annd, if I change, then I'll change class too!, and I rather that not happen. So how??

Hahaa.. we told her there was air-con in the guys toilet and she believed it!

o lvl stress?

2008-01-26T00:24:00.000+08:00

I realised there's more to life than just myself.. Actually I already knew, but found out again yesterday. I might not be bothered by my results at all, but I'm bothered by the situations of my friends... Some people didn't do so well and are quite upset. But I'm concerned about those who did too well.. Seems like they want to stay in AC, but their parents want them to go to better schools. I'll keep you guys all in prayer, and God will help you choose your path!

Annd I just learned lindy-hop from Elina, Moses, and YunHui today!, yay, it was fun! I managed to learn it surprisingly fast! Looks like I might be dancing again.. but everyone's going overseas!!! I must had complained about that many times already.. haha, put up with me until I get over it..

For every person in this world, God has a plan for you. Trust Him and have faith. Believe that his plan is for a good future and a hope, even though you can't see it now. There is always a way. God did not create us to so that we may suffer.

results..

2008-01-24T19:46:00.000+08:00

I guess I'm supposed to have a post about the O level results. Well, thank God so so much. I BEAT MY SISTER!!! Okayy.. haha, it wasn't much of a big deal, but she was like a role model to me, someone who I remembered studying very hard for exams and doing so well. - she got 9. I got 8.
I like the look of my result slip.. haha, it's like AAAAAAAC. So I suppose I know which JC I'm going to already..
To tell the truth, I wasn't bothered by the release of the results. Probably only really wanted to do well for Physics coz I'm taking it as H3 next year, and getting an A2 for it would be rather demoralising.
Seems like Fairfield did well too. First time since the batch of 1992, according to Ms Lim.. Haa.. and my form teacher tried to scare me before I got the results. She was going "Joel, did you study for your O levels?" Too bad I had faith in God's plan, or my reaction would have been more entertaining for her.
So readers, all the best for whatever you're doing in life! And please keep reading my blog which would never have lasted without you guys!

2008-01-23T21:12:00.000+08:00

Aw.. choir is 3 times a week.. And my timetable is probably the worst of all the pcme's. I don't get to take lunch on Wednesdays and 3 of 5 days end late..
Actually, choir was not as boring as I thought it would be. Yes, we were singing the whole rehearsal, but somehow, singing gave me a sense of satisfaction. And when I stopped singing and listened to the whole choir, I realised how professional the AC choir was, even with the J1s singing, most with no experience.
I got 14/55 for my gp's general knowledge test -.- Seems like I need to start reading time again. The econs lecturer is a crapper. Literally. If he were my tutor I would fail econs. My sympathies to the classes who got him.
And I know it's the O level results tmr.. Quite hard to forget when your whole day is filled with tutorials that has tutors constantly talking about it.. If you guys wanna know about me, I'm not really feeling anything. But I do care about the results. Just hoping to stay in ac.

Indescribable

2008-01-17T19:45:00.000+08:00

What is this feeling indescribable?
Fresh like the early morning sun,
Peaceful like the setting.

Yet it has no sense of time.
It never started, because it was always present.
It does not seem to finish, even after the end has past.

Does it take pity on those is ensnares?
Does it fulfil itself to whom it is bounded to?
Or does it exist just for the sake of bringing painful longing.

The day and night disappears.
There is no more hour or second.
The mind is subdued by it, like a prisoner forever locked in a cage.

Does it ever release?

Who's blessed

2008-01-14T20:49:00.000+08:00

Matthew 5 - The Beattitudes
They are called the beattitudes because they are forms of mentality that we as Christians should assume, thus called "Be - Attitudes".

"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven."
They poor in spirit are those who recognize that they cannot exist alone, thus being poor in spirit. These people realize their need for God, and the Kingdom of Heaven is given to them.

"Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth."
The meek are those who are humble, or the "strong but silent". Being humble enough to not assume you are humble yourself, the earth is his.

"Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy"
If you show mercy before judgement, God will do the same to you. So do that unto others first, and you will be shown mercy.

Matthew 5:3-11 is probably the part of the Bible that I like the most. So much can be learnt from it.

Anyway, Elina's going off end January! So many people going overseas to study, then Moses will be leaving in Feb. The farewell picnic is on the 25th Jan at botanical gardens, be there!

... cca problems...

2008-01-12T22:50:00.000+08:00

Guyys!!, stop telling me to quit choir and join dance, it's not just a personal choice but also a path God wants me to take and I'm sure of it, after many prayers. And wasn't my meaning in the previous post clear enough? My personality is not a popular, high profile guy, so I just don't think I'll fit, even if I enjoy what I'm doing. Plus, choir is going overseas to nice places, I enjoy singing and I like the people there...

Now let's get on with the post... great I forgot...

JC life

2008-01-12T00:23:00.000+08:00

AC, especially, have it's students divided into groups. The first social group is called the DSAs, where these guys have to go for their sports trainings almost everyday, becoz they got in not having to use their prelim results. The second group is the "High Profile" people. There are actually people who get in without any academics, cca, whatever, they just have a lot of resources. You'll probably find them in dance, ya, that kind of ccas. Please, upon reading this, don't consider my previous posts about me joining dance, kind of sort of why I'm not in there now... Then there are the "Mind our own business, care about our friends" group. From my biased view, they're probably the nicest people to be with.
Now why am I typing this.. I've been talking to lots of ex-AC friends, and they've influenced me to think their way. JC is totally a lot more different from sec sch.. The 'family' mood is gone, and things just become cool, we start to divide ourselves more. I really enjoyed orientation, and this 'cool' mood. But hanging out with fairsians again revives the united, bonded, spirit. I kinda miss it sometimes. Thats why every morning, the yellows flock together. My seniors say it happens every year.
Now lets get on with my life, that's what a typical blog is for right? ahaa.. but this is not a typical blog you're reading, so bye!

choir?

2008-01-11T16:19:00.001+08:00

okay!.. I'm joining choir. Thank God for telling me where to go, I really couldn't decide at all. The only problem about choir is that they train longer on saturdays when competitions are near, then I might be late for ypm.. And it's not just 2 times a week cos there are section trainings too, so I might not be able to join another sports cca.

AC has been maintaining its 'fun' mood so far, even the lectures are so crazy. We bring food to eat, play battleships using handphones. Some of the lecturers are nice too. The physics teacher really does his best to make everything so fun, and the econs lecturer adds a 'ya' to every sentence he finishes. And 90% of the time he's saying something cynical about Malays (he's one), or the government..

SO see ya guys, have fun where ever you are, and join AC!!!

CCAs!!

2008-01-10T00:23:00.000+08:00

I went for choir auditions, and they were somewhat impressed, I can say. They just told me to go for 2nd auditions. But I would probably not be joining. If I get into dance, which I am quite confident of.. haha.. the instructor was crazy.. like so scary during my audits, plus many people went for it too. Ah, just hope for the best, choir is only if I don't make it into dance.
For now, I'm just enjoying jc life, AC seems to be the most slack, with all the other jcs starting lessons already, mine's next week. Will be quite sad, my OG will be split up coz we're all going to different classes. Basically, the bio and physics people. And even if we take exactly the same combo, we might not be in the same class. So I guess we'll be having more OG outings, which I hope is not just limited to HV and Dover...

updates on my life..

2008-01-07T20:46:00.000+08:00

Life in JC is really starting to get busy. After the mock and introductory lectures, we're gonna start lessons. And I'm probably gonna be in 3 ccas- Lifeguards, Dance, Christian Fellowship. Lifeguards sounded really fun, and I love swimming, I think. Dance is a passion, and I'll probably give up any other cca for it. I'm not a person who loves dancing, but a person who has to dance, in order to express my emotions. I do feel the most relaxed and natural when dancing. For those who are having weird impressions of me now, it's actually modern dance, the kind that makes you perspire. CF is not much of a cca for me, but I was just looking for a group of people to start the day with in devotions and prayer.
Some people didn't like the way CF did their stuff apparently, so I'm going to check it out first, or maybe just start my own with a few friends.
So here's my subject combi:
Physics, Chemistry, Maths, Economics,
with econs as h1. After today's lectures, I realised how stressful jc is. So many topics to be learnt in 2 years. My orientation group leaders told me at least 30-40 j1's retain every year. Sounded quite scary, but I'm confident, cause I do enjoy all the subjects I'm taking. And I might be taking Physics h3. Either this year as a research project, or next year as a written paper. The research is probably more fun, if I cant actually qualify for it. But my presentation has to be made to physics professors, and j1 would be a mad year. Or I can do the typical 's' paper method: study extra topics and take an exam, which would be next year.
Anyway guys, all the best for this new year and beyond with whatever you're doing in life. Be sure it's something you're passionate about, do not be deterred by opposition or external opinions.

ac orientation

2008-01-04T21:46:00.000+08:00

It's been 3 days of orientation in AC, and it's really great, for me, that is. After learning so many mass dances, my dance partner is a nice person :) I feel like joining dance or something.. lol.. probably will. Cheers were unique too, made it more fun since we were divided into clans and groups. Do you know even our orientation has a storyline>?? And a very funny one at that..
We've been playing games, obviously... Today was the dirtiest, and what the Orientation group leaders consider the "most fun". Yeah it was fun, pushing them into the mud. Now someone asked me whether I would change to a better jc if I found out I could. It wasn't that I didn't know, but I guess I shouldn't answer. The best answer now I give you guys is that it depends on something..
To whoever who didn't know what was going on today when I said I was waiting for someone, if you're actually reading this, thanks for visiting my blog. And that was a very good pretence, or you were really ignorant.

The way she speaks makes her sound so honest~
Her presence was good enough for me...

Too bad it's just one-sided misery.

1st day of school.

2008-01-02T21:02:00.000+08:00

When I realised how few Fairsians there were at AC, I was not surprised. Those who did very well for prelims were the people who wanted to achieve as much as possible. Those who didn't do well went to JJ. The rest are working. So there were less than 20 people from Fairfield in AC today.
Orientation was as usual. Everything an orientation is supposed to be like, it was. But I admit, AC is a really fast JC. Fast meaning not lagging. I felt more belonged to a JC than any other type of institution.

More people are telling me I'm too old for my age. I don't feel offended or anything, but I really wonder why this is so. Maybe I've been mixing too much with the 'old' people in church.

AC should be fun, found someone in my group to talk to.

Happy New Year

2007-12-31T23:30:00.000+08:00

Blessed New Year to all my readers.

Nearing the end...

2007-12-30T23:15:00.000+08:00

According to my countdown timer, It's almost 1 day more to the end of the year. But to me, it really doesn't mean anything. A "year" is just a form of measurement that men created. For all you know, the earth may not be revolving around the sun at all. What if the universe was revolving around the earth?, taking that the big bang theory is wrong.

But anyways, it's gonna be the new year soon. I feel that this year has been the year of most meaning of the 16 years of my life. Meaning means I've accomplished the most this year. So many things that I wouldn't just say here. But it's the year I've learnt the most.

I'm wondering: do you readers make new year resolutions? Quoting from Matthew, (RE)(Solutions) sound like we've failed at a particular thing many times, and we are just thinking of new solutions to do it, which I admit, is just crap. We make resolutions so that we have something to work towards. Since "year" doesn't mean anything to me, this is my resolve

Cant Write

2007-12-27T21:07:00.000+08:00

Blogger's Block... Been staring at this page for ages and I still don't know what to type..

2007-12-22T22:36:00.000+08:00

I'm finally back to ypm, after two weeks. Today's cell meeting was really fun.. We discussed a skit for the Joseph/Enoch Christmas dinner next Friday. Elina really knows her stuff, from the random word thingy to the story making. And I'm going to teach!! But to a much older group this time. Most are older than me actually. I wish more younger people will come for bible study. Also hoping that I will be able to get more people to help revive the youth ministry prayer meetings next year, when so many of them are going overseas to study. Matthew, Melissa, Shalyn.. etc etc.. zzz.

Despair

2007-12-21T14:02:00.000+08:00

What is the difference between the day a person is born, and the day she dies? To you readers, there probably is a rather clear distinction. But for her family members, her close friends, every year that passes, there is no specific two times to grieve. It is prolongs until the healing of our despair. There is no difference. But mourning should only last for that period of time. Rejoicing comes after, knowing where she has gone. Her birthday may be on December 12, the day she left on August 11. But The physical loss was so great that any significant dates didn't matter.
Someone recently asked me why I changed my facebook status from engaged to single. I was laughing for quite a while, but thanks for the concern :) "Too many busybodies" I replied. It was true. If you're here, sorry for not replying for reply, I didn't feel like..

Strongholds

2007-12-19T22:51:00.001+08:00

Everyone has strongholds in their lives. Strongholds are things in our lives that take priority. For the unbeliever, his stronghold is unbelief of God's word. For us Christians, our strongholds are mainly of idolatry. It may be a stronghold of material items - computer games, branded goods, whatever is so important to us that we lose sight of God. A stronghold of pride is a priority of self, or self-obsession. A stronghold of guilt is letting our regret of wrongdoings overcome us, and we forget why we are Christians in the first place. A stronghold of hate and unforgiveness is allowing human feelings to prevent us from realising that everyone makes mistakes. In any case, everyone has strongholds.
So how then, do we break down these strongholds? They are strong, because they are from the devil. Any idol but God is the devil. Any hate, anger is from the devil. Pornographic materials are the devil Any sadness is from the devil. So keep in mind that our God is almighty, that he is the strongest and that can never change. We break strongholds by attacking it. The only offensive part of the armour of God is the sword, which represents the word of God. Also, we must keep in prayer with God. With the weapon of God's word to break those strongholds, they can be destroyed. Yet watch yourself by keeping in a close relationship with God by constantly praying, filled with the holy spirit.
Lastly, Merry Christmas, all ye faithful readers of my blog. If you're actually reading this, rest assured you won't be forgotten when I go for last minute Christmas shopping. Unless of course you're some anonymous person who hasn't tagged before or I don't know.

Back from turkey, back to church

2007-12-17T00:58:00.000+08:00

The lead singer welcomed us all to service today, sounding familiar, as I heard him almost every week. I greeted the usual ushers, taking the weekly church "magazine". Quickly, I glanced at the tithes declaration, dismayed as I saw the smaller number for December than November. Still, there was hope, December wasn't over yet. I turned to the left and walked down the stairs to the 5th row from the front, and sat on the 2nd seat from the left. The usual place.
Something unusual, many people were absent. The usual people were not there. A few self-convincing guesses assured me. "They must be fatigued from the YPM camp, or perhaps sick, or overseas?"
We started singing Christmas songs. Isn't it 2 weeks to Christmas? I couldn't register nor remember the words for the songs. We only sing them once a year right?
Sadly, people who remember Christmas only once a year are to be pitied. What a great day Christmas is. Too bad so few experience the true meaning of it. Yet it's all planned already- the total number of Christians before the 2nd coming, the number of Christians gone through mission work, and the number of sins. Then, the plagues will be poured upon the earth within 7 years of trials and tribulations.
"I want to be there when it happens".
"I want to die during that time or last till the end of it".

Not overseas again...

2007-12-04T16:12:00.000+08:00

I'm leaving soon. The previous post was not a sudden feel like typing kind of post. This is probably the first time I'm not enjoying an overseas trip. Anyway... I'll be contactable through my e-mail and may occasionally be on msn. Don't bother trying my phone after 7pm, if urgent it's 96720217.
Send e-mails?? ya?

Going Turkey??

2007-12-02T21:45:00.000+08:00

Somehow, going overseas this time doesn't seem so nice. I'm not looking forward to it. It's not because of my new computer, or that I love Singapore too much, or I'm afraid of negative temperatures... It's the people. The people who I don't know at all. The people who I always go on holidays with. And, the people who are not going.
The person who I won't see for 11 days?? I wished I stayed for ypm camp...

"!!! She's older than you??"
"Forget it, she treats you more like a junior than a friend."
"Not like you were of any impression, just a first timer..."

2007-12-01T12:11:00.000+08:00

This is a direct copy/paste from the report I wrote for the church magazine, including my testimony.

Mission Trip to Setapak, KL
23rd to 25th November 2007
To carry out Jesus’ last command, to go and make disciples of all nations. This was the purpose of the mission trip.
The team of five, Matthew, Serene, Jun Yuan, Jia En and I met on an early Friday morning, with this purpose in our hearts. After a prayer with Bro Kim San and Bro Ang, our driver, we set off for Setapak, Kuala Lumpur.Upon arriving in the late afternoon, we prepared tracts printed by the church before setting off to the flats in the neighbourhood with Sis Mei Lan, the church’s pastor. Watching her hold the conversation with such great panache made us confident ourselves and we were quickly done with three blocks. During this time, we also noticed the small number of Christians who lived in the area, realizing how large the harvest field was. Still, we invited them to our evangelistic outreach on Saturday, entitled, “The Secret to Success”.
That night, we joined the Wangsa community for LG. Though the meeting place was small, we enjoyed praising God together as a family of Christians. I was greatly encouraged when I saw the youths’ fervour for God. Matthew, the leader of the group, then shared about evangelizing. When Jesus sent His disciples to spread the gospel, He told them to “Take nothing but a staff…” (Mark 6:8). This staff is the Holy Spirit, the guidance of God. As the staff is always placed before our foot takes a step, evangelism must be carried out by following God.
The next morning, we covered two more blocks of flats and returned to the church for SuperKids, a weekly programme aimed at nurturing young children to grow closer to God. Singing along and doing actions with them brought back many memories from when I was in Sunday School.
The Evangelistic Outreach, the main event of our mission trip, began in the evening with a few items - we sang a song and performed a skit. This skit posed questions for the people. What is success to us? How do we achieve success? Serene and Sis Mei Lan complimented each other in their testimony and sermon respectively by saying that the secret to success was God. Even if we possess wealth, popularity, or academic qualifications, success would not be complete without Jesus Christ in our lives as we will not be happy.
Not only has this mission trip allowed us to encourage the church in KL, we were encouraged ourselves when we saw the work God had done through them. Praise the Lord for the church, so willing and ever ready to carry out the Great Commission, to go and make disciples of all nations.
Joel.

From left, Me, Jia En, Jun Yuan, Serene, Matthew

We went tracting here!, covered 5 blocks in total

The kids programme, I was supposed to be involved but I was the photographer...

I cant remember if this is after the saturday outreach or sunday service, anyway, food was great!, prepared by the church

Not many photos now, I havent received the rest from Serene, so I cant do nuts about designing the mag page either..

Stardust....

2007-11-28T14:37:00.000+08:00

~Stardust~
This movie was good enough for me to be watching it twice. Since it's been in cinemas for quite a long time, here's a full review, hope everyone has watched it already.
The word"stardust" was probably mentioned only once in the movie, if anyone noticed. However, it's significance was great.
A typical fantasy movie, two worlds, one like the one we live in, the other magical. A typical movie concept, eat the heart of a star and gain everlasting life. A typical complication, evil people try to capture the star. A typical climax, good and evil fights. A typical ending, good wins and they live happily ever after. They didn't even die of old age! But these "reactants", I shall say, were the perfect ingredients to the wonderful combination, or "combo" for a movie.
Now what's special? Firstly, there were many, many, exciting parts. Exciting means a point in the movie where it looks like it's the climax. There was the really cool murders you only see in CSI, the part where magical fire scorched the whole screen and we all thought the witch was gonna win, and of course, the fight between the two sides. This was put together very nicely with the peaceful parts, where the good guys start to like each other more, they learn new stuff, they have their own thoughtful conversations. Did I mention that Captain Shakespear reminded me of Brom, from Eragon? Anyway, I wasn't in perspiration and adrenaline throughout the whole movie. Even the quieter parts were interesting, bringing out clearly the moral of the story, which was that love does not require acts of devotion, or material gifts. Whether it is right or not, thats up to you guys to decide, I won't comment.

Enchanted

2007-11-26T21:19:00.000+08:00

Enchanted was good, very deserving of at least 4 stars. This review is spoiling, so don't read it if you haven't watched it.
The storyline itself was a mfjwnfwenf mix of manymany different stories that most of you may identify easily, though being slightly sarcastic of other fairy tales at times. (It takes skill to detect it..) There was a girl who was about to marry her prince after about a day of dating, but was sent by his stepmother to the real world, where she met another guy. After beginning to learn more about the real world and liking it, the prince appears to rescue her. As usual, the bad guys tried to stop it and they were defeated, and happily ever after. What was special about Enchanted was the concept of the fairy tale world and the real world. In the fairy tale world, everything is happy happy happy, an ideal place to live in. However, life would be boring there. In the real world, there are complications, which was appealing to the girl.
To sum it up, watch it.

A broken heart is more painful than a longing heart.
If it is a 'no' Lord, please don't tell me.

Mission trip to Setapak, KL

2007-11-25T20:10:00.000+08:00

Just came back from KL, from the mission trip. It was just great!. With only 5 people, we went tracting, organised lessons, prepared items and testimonies for the church in KL. Maybe when I get the report done for the trip, I'll just type it here, but I'm really tired now...

malaysia tmr

2007-11-23T00:22:00.000+08:00

Yay.. I'm going to msia tmr, finally out of singapore..

///

2007-11-21T22:21:00.001+08:00

I guess it's a confirm I'm not gonna work this holidays.. Friday's a mission trip to KL, coming back on Sunday. It will be fun. But I'll be missing ypm and church service.. Then I'll be going to Turkey for 11 days, coming back for Class Chalet. Making class video for next year, celebrating Christmas, holidays over..

"He used google to search for your blog"
"lol? Why??"
"He didn't know how to spell precognitions"

holidays??

2007-11-15T15:45:00.000+08:00

Hm. holidays are kinda fun, ya? But life's weird without studying. I'm just starting to read the whole dark is rising series again.. last time was p4, can't remember anything. And not to spoil the story, I'm not gonna watch seeker, since everyone's saying it's lousy.
>>Last staurday> Street Evangelism. It was really fun!.. Our whole youth service went around the area up to East Coast Park and Katong mall. I'm hoping to see this saturday's service packed.
And the past few day have been psp. When you have 40gig worth of games to play, your charger really gets overused.

"No point chasing him huh? He'll probably climb the tree to escape."
"Then I'll knock down the tree"

2007-11-13T11:24:00.000+08:00

Okayy.. O levels are over.. and I don't feel a thing, probably because I've already started playing a week ago. Sophia and Amy haven't returned me my bike yet... zz.. Would it be weird if I said I don't have anything to do now?, coz o lvls are over.. haha.. these days revolve around movies, psp, and computer..

Lunia

2007-11-10T22:20:00.000+08:00

I just started playing a new mmorpg called lunia, it's also mentioned on joel ng's blog, goto links. Anw, It's ery much like survival project, just that the skills are knight online copied. A really good and addictive game. It just needs more maps and players. Right now it's really difficult to play the high level quests because noone's around to help, since it's such a new game. I guess it will be better when more people know about it.
Lunia Website

holidays here??

2007-11-09T09:15:00.000+08:00

I guess it will be safe huh, planning my holidays now since I already played until 3 this morning. Here's what's gonna happen
12th - 27 th Nov
PSP/Movies/hanging around with people
28th Nov - 1st Dec
BB Annual camp
4th - 14th Dec
Overseas trip
18th - 20th Dec
Class Chalet

Of course, thats just a frame, when the time comes and I feel like doing something then I have all the time in the world. And the 11 hour plane flight wont be so boring now that I've hacked my psp.. haha..
Now warbook on facebook rocks eh??.. It's just too addictive, but doesnt take up too much time.

MCQs?, What MCQs???....

new skin?

2007-11-03T22:42:00.000+08:00

Yay.. the new skin is up.. it took me a record time of 25 mins to rearrange the badly screwed up html and put in my stuff..
why do I like dark skins??.. I dunno.. but white skins are glaring.. I don't like hot colours..
and the navigation buttons just rock.. just mouse over.. haha..

english over

2007-10-29T19:56:00.001+08:00

O levels can be considered over... wait there's still physics and ss. Anws, the English is finally over. As usual, I wrote the discursive essay, since there was no argumentative. It was fun though, spamming all my SS and geog knowledge into it. About, rural-urban migration, environmental problems, sustainable development, housing, development, and Singapore's industrial development. The topics I chose to study for SS seemed to help me in english, hope it's tested in SS too, then ACJC it is.
I'm feeling too complacent for E Maths tmr eh??, I bet most of us are, quite scary, just gonna look through some papers, memorixe some formulas, then it's mugging for physics.
\Life's getting boring with O levels, Restrictive parents, especially when it's the subject they're teaching. Again "THEY", both of them are teachers, which really is a good thing, or supposed to be anyway, without my mum calling during lunch to ask if I checked my grammer, sentence structure, spelling...zzz blahblahblah, for the english paper 1. At least my dad's lax on e maths. Being a teacher is not so bad, the only thing that attracts me to be a teacher is because I dont want to forget the knowledge I so painstakingly learn and memorize when I dont use it in life. Teaching is a way to retain it, but sounds stupid huh?
I asked Mrs Choe about history, she said it was a redundant subject, people learn it for the sake of studying it, but I guess it would be fun, reading storybooks during lessons. And I'm so gonna write a list of stuff to do after O's, so tempting to do it now, but that would mean the whole night. and more.

Like the new Yellowcard album? not so new, but paper walls is just great.

oops, I'm not supposed to be posting until after 12 nov.. ahh.. but O levels just feels so easy all of a sudden..

I just thought, it wouldnt be too bad to go to Cjc.. the teachers there are my friends.. ok.. not really plural.. but I wouldnt mind free maths tution. or is tution spelled as tuition?, coz my dictionary is bugging me to change it.. cjc is far..far..far. away... I dont even know where, but ac's uniform is the best..

ahhh crap.. 2 paragraphs ago I was considering to stop typing..

And the scammers at orchard road are gone.. someone must have reported it.. the stupid people selling pens for 5 bucks.. they have the same speech every saturday.. "" We cannot sell 200 pens at one time, so we rely on people like you to buy 1 or 2 pens.. What religion? Oh Christian.. Jesus loves you, why not bless the less fortunate by buying a pen?"" Orchard road seems more pleasant without them.. Library is closing soon... why???

It seems like the rubik cube thingy has spread to other schools.. ppl in my church are obsessed..

I NEED STARBUCKS.. even though i had one yesterday.. ice-blended mocha just rocks huh?? So does the library's milkshakes..

Annual camp is on 28th to 1st.. yeah.. cant wait for some relax. meanwhile, the rest of the holidays will be on my psp.. yea!! my psp.. finally getting one,,, and hm.. my custum com, bike and drumset.. holidays just seems so short.. tempted not to go for the first month of jc.. already have -4 points, but seniors say orientation is fun.. should I go??

And I'm moving house next year.. cant wait for my own room.. somewhere in west coast.. the condo opposite the cheese prata shop. macs just nearby.. hahaha.. Someone help me ask them to hurry up finish building..

Back to just now, I think annual camp is in chalet, like 2 years ago.. but what are they gonna do?? pulau ubin again?? And another chalet in december.. my class chalet, and I would probably be going.. My parents will be in Malaysia.. so life would be fun.. for a while..

okayokay.. will. stop. posting. now.

back from studying

2007-10-28T00:11:00.000+08:00

Finally have some time back for life.. O levels have been crazy, but surprisingly easy. I can breathe again once english is over. After that would be like slack. I wish I could list all the stuff I need and want to do after 12 Nov, but,,, haha, it would go on forever.

happy birthday...

2007-10-04T16:06:00.000+08:00

okayokay.. this post is an exception to what I said to the previous one...
Happy 124th Birthday to the Boys' Brigade
and Happy Birthday to me.. lol...
Thanks to Lijia, Joel Tan, for the early wishes, the ones right on the dot - viv, matthew, & eliza for the 2:22 am wishes. 5 hours later.... Jermyn, Alex, Jazmon Mark Ho, Jeraldine, Zhong Sheng, Jonathan, anyone else I can't remember, and to the 11 poeple who screamed into eliza's phone on loudspeaker, I don't know who you are.. haha, I can guess... Anyway, I'm sure this will be a blessed birthday with all of your "blessings"..
now back to physics.....

studying....zz!!

2007-10-01T22:21:00.000+08:00

If I ever post here again before 12 November.. someone kill me...

O lvl stress

2007-09-26T18:29:00.000+08:00

Oh great, O lvls have negative effects besides me losing my social life, at least, for this period of time. My parents just found the first strand of grey(or sometimes called white) hair on my head. I'm lucky it's only one strand, unlike some of my friends. Let's hope it's really because of O lvls. I don't think I like the idea of having grey hairs at this age.
Anyway, facebook is fun, there are stuffs like different applications to add to your profile, well.. join and find out.
For now, it's just trying hard to get the 9 points. It doesnt matter which subjects are pro or not, just the 9 points will do.
Isn't it amazing how God answers our prayers? After hearing that the pure physics students did very badly for prelims, I expected a B3, and prayed that I would at least get it. And I did, was thankful though not very happy. I admit I've always been proud of excelling in Physics. I realised I needed only 2 marks to get an A2. I spotted some mistakes, prayed for the A2, went to Ms Ong. Unfortunately, I only received half a mark, so it was a 69.3%. Then, when we were about to leave, she announced that physics would be moderated!!.. haha, so I guess I God did give me the A2 eventually, though not in the way I thought it would come.

go... where??

2007-09-21T23:33:00.000+08:00

Can I go to AC with L1R5 12?? probably.. if bonus points are included for the first few weeks. I really hope to go there, no point getting attached to another jc through orientation then go to ac after results are out. Ms Hia says I should go to some other jc if I can't. It does make sense, then at least I can confirm another -4 points for another jc in case I can't go to ac.

But for now, I guess it's just to work hard through the next month. Hope it pays off well. I realised I can restrict myself from the computer quite well.

prelim results

2007-09-19T17:09:00.000+08:00

Finished getting all my results today.. Without comparison to my class or anything, I think it sucked. I didn't achieve my goals, that is to say...
English - B3
E Maths - A1
A Maths - B4
Comb. Humans - B4
Physics - A2
Chemistry - A1
D&T - A1

An L1R5 of 12. I guess I shall go to acjc for the first few weeks and tell them I'm an arts student. So 8 shall do. Since I will do better for O's, then it's no problem. English was really a surprise. In class, I never get more than C5. I was hoping it was not because the compo was marked leniently, or what I'm getting is just false hope. E Maths, Chem ,D&T was expected, nothing much to say about them. Physics was rather disappointing. I got a B3, 69%, so it will be moderated to an A2. A Maths was worse, should have practiced more.. zz, I didn't put in much effort in preparation.
Personally, I don't think moderation should be carried out. What we get would then be not what we really achieved. I was happy for the news, but not exactly yay. It's like a fake result just because everyone did badly. But of course, I still want the A2.

prelims over

2007-09-13T21:52:00.000+08:00

The rain is over, thunderstorm approaches. Based on the time between the lightning flashed and the thunder sounded, the storm is probably about 720 hours away is it travels at a constant speed of 1km/h.
Anyway, my predictions for prelims...
English - B3
E Maths - A1
A Maths - B3
SS/Geog - A2
Physics - A2
Chemistry - A1
D&T - A2

Which means L1R5 is 10. Of course, it's more hope than predict.
After prelims, people are playing pokemon, for some reason. Everyone's playing it.

hahaha, this my new neopet!! It leveled 4 times in 5 days... and I got a gold trophy for some card game...

2007-09-12T16:31:00.000+08:00

Taken the test??.. It's somewhat accurate...

Cattell's 16 Factor Test Results

Warmth		70%
Intellect		82%
Emotional Stability		74%
Aggressiveness		66%
Liveliness		66%
Dutifulness		74%
Social Assertiveness		74%
Sensitivity		38%
Paranoia		54%
Abstractness		70%
Introversion		66%
Anxiety		50%
Openmindedness		62%
Independence		62%
Perfectionism		66%
Tension		26%

Take Cattell 16 Factor Test (similar to 16pf)
personality tests by similarminds.com